Bagrut Bloopers

Finally tackling some papers I've been saving for too long, I discovered a gem of a collection of mistakes that Israeli High School seniors made on their English matriculation exams*:

[Pizza preparation]

Try putting fungus on your pizza.

You should preparing the pizza as follows: Put the floud and water in the bowel and scrumble it with the spoon.

To make pizza, you have to hit the oven first.

[Application for a summer camp counselor job]

Before I started to play basketball, I was a thick child.

I would like to know the conditions in the camp and if I have to sleep with the youth.

I was in America several times and so I speak fluency English.

[Environmental issues]

We should put garbage into a pubic bin.

In Haifa, there are breeding problems among older people.

Because Israel is a small country, it gets dirty easily.

The Israeli drivers use their zippers a lot and make a lot of noise.

*collected by Stephen Schulman, Senior Examiner for the 1994 Bagrut English Examination, published in an AACI magazine.