When I took art lessons many years later, I learned from my wonderful teachers that "mistakes" are not what I thought. Instead of dwelling on the mistake as a personal failure, I could try to look at it objectively, as an unintended outcome, a kind of surprise. I could spend my energies determining what to do with it. In art, I could either throw out the unfinished work, erase or overpaint the "mistake," or use the mistake to go in a different direction: software developers do it when they turn a bug into a feature. This approach demands more creativity than "yes/no," or "good/bad," but it's also more
I certainly didn't expect to get divorced when I got married: who does? A family that experiences divorce has plenty of work to do to stay functional, and has to create many of its own transitions, such as the pickup and dropoff of childen with the other parent. Anyhow, in the end, I came up with a solution about my wedding ring that I am still happy with: after a suitable time had elapsed – I don't remember whether it was months or years – I took the thick gold wedding ring from my jewelry box to the jewelry district, where, ironically, my ex-father-in-law used to work, and traded it in for a gift to myself: a smaller gold ring that I still wear all the time on my left pinky.